WHOA!!

I got the rudest awakening this morning!

But once my balls and stomach had peeled off I could return to my daily routine, which includes drinking broskis, watching headbangers ball and occasionally writing a dissertation on Paul Auster.

When suddenly I was visited by an angel, a fucking awesome beautiful angel who had a message for me:

No, not that, tell me something I don’t know!

No, that’s not it. I don’t usually shop there. What the fuck did that Angel say that filled me with God’s Good News and made me all bright and shiny like an audience member on Oprah?

I can’t remember. I was TOTALLY tweaking on Angel Dust. (Irony.) I was FREAKING OUT!

But rest assured, John Pauls, I will figure out today, or maybe like early tomorrow. This week I will definitely figure out what that fucking angel said to me, and then it’s your ass, Charlton, you hear me?

 

In the meantime, the danse macabre continues….

The circle of life.

DUDE!!! HEATH LEDGER/HEATHER LEDGER!!!!!!!!!!NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Sorry! I got pretty busy there for a moment!

Dude, did you hear that dude died? No, not the dude from the Client, the dude from Ten Things I Hate About You. S’true. Happened about a block away from where I was working. I saw the whole thing. Dude was B;U;S;T;E;D; and he looked right at me.

(AWWWWWW Too soon?)

I felt real bad for the dude who had to go up and clean his guts. Yikes! Dude!

(AWWWW…Too Soon?) Dude totally shouldn’t have put his finger that close to the face of Heather Ledger. Dude, I was totally walking down the street and found Dude’s suicide note!

I know there’s one dude who’s pleased about news of Dude’s passing!

I was talking about the dude on the left.