WHOA!!

I got the rudest awakening this morning!

But once my balls and stomach had peeled off I could return to my daily routine, which includes drinking broskis, watching headbangers ball and occasionally writing a dissertation on Paul Auster.

When suddenly I was visited by an angel, a fucking awesome beautiful angel who had a message for me:

No, not that, tell me something I don’t know!

No, that’s not it. I don’t usually shop there. What the fuck did that Angel say that filled me with God’s Good News and made me all bright and shiny like an audience member on Oprah?

I can’t remember. I was TOTALLY tweaking on Angel Dust. (Irony.) I was FREAKING OUT!

But rest assured, John Pauls, I will figure out today, or maybe like early tomorrow. This week I will definitely figure out what that fucking angel said to me, and then it’s your ass, Charlton, you hear me?

 

In the meantime, the danse macabre continues….

The circle of life.

I just saw 2 girls 1 cup

It wasn’t that bad. I mean, I think it got bad reviews which led to its poor box office. Another strike against indie cinema.

The fucked up thing is somebody conceived of this thing.

Then somebody had to shoot it. You know it smelled bad in there.

And then, and this is the grossest thing about it all, is that it was EDITED. I don’t know how many of you have experience with editing, But you can’t edit a ten second spot without at least a couple of hours reviewing the footage OVER and OVER.

And then they had to probably cut at least two versions of the piece, not including promos and teasers. Wow.

Actually the messed up thing is after the first ten seconds or so, you get kind of non-plussed, like it no longer offends you and you just sit there and take it, like when you go to a basketball game and your team loses badly. But you bought the ticket. Or maybe I’m more jaded than most.

Anyways, I’m gonna go have some soft-serve ice cream. See you later great satans.

What do you do in this situation?

Seriously, you bagged this one, you got this chick home, she’s on her hands and knees hiking up her skirt and you get a glimpse of this:

What the FUCK do you do? Are you telling me you could seriously jizz on the SCRIPTURE?

Apox on both your houses!

Still Shreddin’

Recent rehearsh for our new band, Ducky Wensislaus, that’s the new dude Tommy wildin’ out on the skins.

Here’s our new manager, Dread Sheckles, aka one Alan Smith, dudebro’in it up at my sister’s bris:

Cool dude.

ALBUM COVER(?)